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  • Writer's pictureVanessa VanRich

Past Life Coming Through: Show Up and Have Faith

A Parent's Story

According to Dr. Jim Tucker who is a Bonner-Lowry Professor of Psychiatry and Neurobehavioral Sciences at the University of Virginia, the Director of the UVA Division of Perceptual Studies, and has studied past life memories for over 20 years,

the average child begins talking about their past lives around their third birthday.

Seventy-five percent of them will talk about how they died in their past life

( podcast with Dr. James Tucker), but in my experience

a child can also remember pieces of their past lives outside of their deaths. There

is a school of thought that if past lives can’t be verified then they aren’t real

and probably pulled from outside sources or a wildly imaginative child.

To me it doesn’t matter what side of the fence you sit on, you only have to

experience it to know that it’s real. To hear the odd calm take over your child’s

voice as they explain the details of a life they once knew or watch them in

complete fear as they explain the end of their past life is an experience to be

honored. Things happen on the parenting journey of intuitive children that only

parents of these sensitive kids can truly understand.

Some children recall pieces of past lives you can’t verify by looking up a name on

the internet or sifting through old newspaper articles at your local library.

Sometimes a child is only able to see bits and pieces that are very real to them and

I believe these stories are also worthy of mention.

Dr. Tucker believes that it’s usually during relaxed times like after a bath or during a car ride when a child is likely to recall a past life.

The following is my account of a past life revealing itself through my then six-year-old daughter.

It’s finally time to put my little one down. Her hair still damp from her evening

shower, leaves squiggly marks all over her pillowcase. After tucking her in I start

to leave her room.

“Oh no, Mommy! I’m scared!” Having been the recipient of such outbursts

before, I calmly walk back over and hold her hand.

“Why are you feeling scared?”

“Because my gifts let me see a scary green skeleton head.”

“Oh. I see. That does sound scary, but remember how I said

that your dreams are messages and clues?”


“Well, this is just another message.”

“But I don’t want it because it’s scary.”

I know how she’s feeling. I was an intuitive child too. It is really unsettling to

receive information you didn’t ask for and don’t understand.

“It might be scary because you don’t understand what it means.” I offer.


Her tense grip began to loosen and the fear slightly melts from her face.

“Close your eyes and ask what this means?”

It’s been my experience that younger children can access information very quickly

and usually do so without hesitation. She closed her eyes and said

“I see a bird now.”

“Oh. How does it make you feel?”

“The birdie makes me feel excited!”

I didn’t ask her what the bird meant. I didn’t want to confuse her which is why I

asked how it makes her feel.

“Oh wow. So the bird makes you feel excited, but the green skeleton head

makes you feel scared?”


Her excitement let me know that the fear is transmuting as the narrative is taking

form, and what kid doesn’t love a good story?

“So you have two feelings. Excited and scared. Scared is just excitement without

breath behind it. Watch.”

I demonstrated the bouncy movement of excitement coursing through my body and

smiled as I breathed. Then I stopped breathing, tensed my body, and scrunched my

eyebrows to show her what scared looked like. She smiled.

“You see? Now that you have named your feelings you might notice you

are feeling a little less scared.”

She tucked herself back in and I went to pick up the wet towels sprawled across the

bathroom floor.


I walk back into her room praying to God that she falls asleep soon.

“I got another message and this time it was a flower.”

“How’s it make you feel?”

“So pretty! And it smells good too.”

“So we had the skeleton, the bird, and now the flower. I wonder

what that’s all about?”

I’m guiding and asking, but allowing her to come up with her own definitions.

“Maybe skeleton angel?”

I felt my heart jump. Now I was afraid. Afraid of what she was seeing. Afraid that

she would be afraid. Afraid I wasn’t going to be able to help her through this

properly. I was having a very human moment.

“No. I’m not sure that’s right since you saw bird wings and not angel


I cringed at my own cowardliness.

“Hmm. I see hair and an ear.”

I breathe slowly, bracing myself for what I was about to hear. Trying to figure out

how I might explain a corpse to a 6-year-old before bed. I calm myself. I put some

breath behind the fear and hope it transmutes into excitement at witnessing my

daughter’s gifts.

“Hair and an ear? Ok. What is it?”

“It’s a girl. It’s me, but I have straight brown hair and big eyebrows.”

Oh thank God. She’s alive!

“Is this you like in the future when you’re older?”

“I’m older, but Mom I don’t want to look like that when I get older!”

“Ok. You won’t. You’re going to look like you when you’re older.”


“When is this? Is this the future?”

“No, Mom. This is the before life, like before I came to Earth this


Bingo! We have confirmation of a past life emerging in her own words.

In our household, we are open about culture and religion. There is room for

differences of opinion and discussions about the great beyond and whatever that

means to different people. I’m a professional Spiritual Intuitive Practitioner

certified in Past Life Regression and many other modalities such as Chakra

Balancing and Energy Healing.

I know past lives show up to be healed and released. They often show us what gifts we carried in past lives or the source of struggles we carry into our current lives, certain phobias like fear of water or heights even though nothing has happened in this life to give us the reason for these fears.

I know that the woman has shown up for my daughter to be seen, healed, and

released. I’ve never discussed past lives with my 6-year-old, but I know she has

had them occur from time to time starting at the age of 2.

After her nap, she came rushing down the stairs looking for her other daddy with the beard and her other playroom with the blue walls. When she was three we were peacefully eating

lunch together when she looked at me and started telling me about how mean her

other mommy was in the scary house with the fire and begging me with tears in her

eyes not to make her go back to that scary house with that mean mommy.

From ages 2-4 I just listened and reassured her that she was now in this life and safe.

Now here we are at age 6 and I can finally offer some guidance and hopefully

bring understanding to the situation.

“What else do you see?” I ask.

“She’s outside in nature with binoculars looking at birds!”

“Oh, how lovely! You like birds too!”

“Yes, I do!”

Satisfied that we weaved together a mini-narrative of her signs we continued her

bedtime routine with books, lullabies, and kisses goodnight.

Thinking about it later, I realized a green skeleton angel is a pretty clear sign that a

past life is coming up to share a message. I made a mental note not to talk my

daughter out of her signs just because they scared me. I didn’t handle it perfectly,

but I did my best and that’s all that I can do. It’s not like there is a well-known,

socially accepted way of parenting your intuitive child. You just have to show

up and have faith.

This past life came up and my child saw what she could handle and went to sleep

peacefully. It was not my job to press for more information and process what we

found. We go where she wants to and stop when she’s ready because it’s not about

me. All I need to do is release the fear of the unknown, help her to explore her

intuitive abilities, and provide a safe space for her to arrive at who she will


For now, we’ll continue working through the fear of receiving messages and help

her build an intuitive vocabulary. Whatever happens next I’ll let her lead and hope

the next little surprise comes up earlier in the day like maybe before bedtime.

A Simple Technique - Allow, Gently Invite, and Trust

I want to share a technique that worked for my daughter and maybe it will help

your child too. I call it--Allow, Gently invite, and Trust.

Allow your child to express ALL of their feelings.

When my daughter begins with fear, I allow the fear to emerge so that we can

sift through it. We use the affirmation “All my feelings are okay.” Every night

before bed to foster this belief.

Gently invite your child to investigate their feelings/narrative/thoughts.

For example, I tell my daughter “Sometimes we feel scared because we don’t

understand, so let’s figure out what it means.” Your approach and wording will

depend on your child, but it should always be gentle and loving.

Trust the process, trust your child, and don’t break your child’s trust.

When my daughter is sharing this information with me and asks me not to tell

the other parent, grandparents, or other people I honor her request. It takes so

much courage to come to an adult and share this big scary thing she doesn’t

understand. I want to be someone she can trust.

For younger children like my daughter, you can also have them draw a picture of

what they are experiencing and allow them to explain it to you if they want. This

gets it out of their bodies so they don’t hold onto it.

If you are concerned at all for your child’s mental health, please contact a mental

health professional who has experience working with intuitive children. I repeat

works with intuitive children. Otherwise, your child may receive a medical

diagnosis when he or she may just need someone to explain how to handle their


As a child, I never went to my parents about my intuitive abilities because I didn’t

understand what it was or how to explain them. I already felt like an oddball and I

didn’t need another reason to be a freak. So I went through all of this alone. Please

don’t make your child do it alone because it’s hard and scary without a friend.

Be your child’s friend, confidant, and advocate. This is nothing to be ashamed of,

it’s a gift. Not everyone experiences past life memories or even knows that

anything exists outside of Now, so they don’t believe in it. That’s okay.

We’re all just trying to parent our children to the best of our ability. As a parent,

you don’t have to go it alone. Reach out to a group like the Highly Intuitive

Kids Parent Community that understands what you’re going through. Together we can

get through this and live in a world where these special children are taken

seriously, believed in, and honored in their communities. But it all starts with how

you react and support your child.

Here are two books listed on the Highly Intuitive Kids website in the Resources/Books section you may find helpful. There are other valuable resources there as well.

Also, please consider joining the Highly Intuitive Kids–Parent Community on

Facebook to be with like-minded parents who understand the experiences you and your child are going through.

Click the link below.

~Written by Vanessa VanRich

Vanessa is a Spiritual Counselor and Intuitive Practitioner currently working in the greater Atlanta area in Georgia. When she’s not busy taking care of her daughter, cooking, or being out in nature, she is working towards her Doctorate in Rohun Therapy at Delphi University. Her mission is to educate, empower, and inspire spiritual growth.

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